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Posts Tagged ‘Pleasure’

CwL Ep121 – The Pleasure Quotient

By lc_support | September 27, 2022 | 0

Listen to this episode as Lisa shares about her now default ‘Pleasure Quotient’ so you can create one too

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“I’m not too proud to say I was wrong”. Dad “I’m not too proud to say I was wrong”.

Dad uttered these words to me just after this photo was taken last weekend.

My family weren’t keen on me going on this trip. They could see I wasn’t exactly thriving when I made the decision.

So of course they were concerned. 

I mean, who does that anyway?! Who packs up their kids, their home and just heads away without a clear plan within the space of a month? 

I’d cried a lot of tears with them over the previous months. Life felt a bit spinny. No direction. 

I’d had complications from a surgery, my body looked gaunt as I’d lost so much weight. 

I literally LOOKED not ok! 

So I get it. I get why they’d be worried. Why they’d try and make me ‘see sense’ and just stay home. 

I was really upset by their response. 

Didn’t they see?? This is going to be the best thing for us!

I haven’t felt this good about a decision for ages! Why are they critical? Why don’t they think I can do this?? 

When I felt particularly disoriented by it all, a special person reminded me that they’re conservative, my fam. That they love me, but don’t see life through the same lens sometimes. 

It was exactly what I needed to hear. It’s ok to be misunderstood. I thought I was used to the feeling of being the black sheep of my family but I guess there was a part of me that wondered… If they don’t believe I can do this…. Maybe I can’t? 

I stuck to my convictions though. And followed my instinct. And, of course, the trip exceeded all my expectations. 

My Dad keenly followed along. We were in close contact and he’s on Instagram! 

And I said to him, this day at my house when he’d said how proud he was of us, that it really would have been nice if he’d expressed belief in me from the start.

“I’m sorry. And I’m not too proud to say that was wrong. I can see it very clearly now, why you needed this. And how amazing you are. I’m very proud of you.”

And tears fell from my eyes. Is not an easy thing, to say those words. And it means a lot to be on the receiving end. 

If there’s a black sheep forging a different path in your family - let them know you’ve got their back. I promise they’ll appreciate it hugely (in fact, it’ll mean the world) ❤️
That moment we ate McDonald’s in Nuremberg airpo That moment we ate McDonald’s in Nuremberg airport at 2am after being dumped there instead of Munich and had to catch a 5:45am train back to Munich after the kids slept on the airport floor for an hour and we then celebrated my son’s 13th birthday on all the rides at Oktoberfest! 

Nope, that moment hasn’t made the cull for the ten short stories I’m including in Moments - which starts dropping from tomorrow!

Listen or read along to stories of special moments from the trip that had a huge effect on me. 

The prelaunch price disappears tonight! So head straight to lisacorduff.com/moments right now to grab the discount ❤️
I can remember the feelings of helplessness and lo I can remember the feelings of helplessness and loneliness at this time. So alone with it all. Life was spinning wildly out of control.

I have lots of videos of this time because we genuinely thought this was rock bottom and it was important to record it to eventually show  how far he (and I) had come once we were living a sober life. 

Unfortunately we didn’t get there. Two years later he was dead. Addiction beat everything.

There is SO MUCH I didn’t understand in this moment. It actually takes my breath away to see that. I was in total service to his addiction. It consumed our lives.

I share this so the people who love people struggling with addiction know they are not alone amongst the confusion, the  chaos, the lies, the gaslighting. 

Every single person knows someone struggling with addiction - of whatever kind. You might not know they are struggling with gambling, pOrn, food, pills, booze - because addiction loves to stay hidden, but I guarantee there’s someone in your world. 

If you are the person, then I encourage you to show up with honesty to those you love. I promise they want your sobriety. They want and miss YOU. 

I have needed to forgive myself for lots that happened during this time. There’s a lot I’d change.

I wish I understood neuro types more and we had found a psychologist that confirmed his suspected autism instead of dismissing it.

I wish I understood and could have advocated better around medications that were in easy supply. 

I wish I had shared with our family and friends earlier instead of keeping the secret. 

So many things I’d do differently if I knew what I know now. 

Addiction is not the cause. It’s the effect.

Those years changed me. 

And every time I talk about it and am inundated with messages I am reminded this is a huge, non-discriminatory problem. 

I read my story, Harvest to audiences around Australia earlier this year. The writing and sharing of that story was a profoundly healing experience. You can listen to the live recording from Brisbane now, when you purchase Moments, a brand new short-story series. Comment ‘Moments’ below and I’ll send you details. Today is the final day to grab the prelaunch special.
That heart lurch when your kid doesn’t need you That heart lurch when your kid doesn’t need you to walk them into school on the morning of camp.

And now I hold my breath until his return.

Will that ever end? 

I knew this stage was coming and I knew the trip would give him a newfound confidence in himself but how do we even manage it all as mums!?! 

The emotions!! 

That push and pull of teen years - I feel him on the cusp. 

The trip we did grew all of us - him in really tangible ways. The moments I had with this boy will live in my heart forever.

I burst with love for him. 

He’s got so much to figure out, but there’s also so much he’s already lived through. 

Such a big heart and big hopes and dreams. 

“Next time we are here mum, I’ll have flown you business class”. 

Oh sweet boy, one day you’ll see that this trip with you was worth more than any fancy aeroplane seat. It was the Rolls Royce of parental experiences and all you had to do was show up.

You made it better by being you. 

You’ll rock Year 7 camp even though the only tents you’ve slept in have been in backyards! 

I trust you in the world, because while I was with you I was letting you show up as the leader you are. (You just haven’t seen it for yourself yet.)

I hope one day you believe in yourself as much as I believe in you ❤️

PS Tuesday is the final day to secure the pre-launch price of ‘Moments’, my brand new short-story series. Comment MOMENTS below and I’ll send you details. Don’t forget I’ve also offered the chance to listen to a live recording of Harvest, my story on love, life and grief through a tough season. Jump in quick ❤️

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